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Published On: 12-14-2006 01:59 AM
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Deer Radiohead. Upon viewing the Muse: Absloution Live DVD, I would like to point out to you that THIS is how you can be pretentious and artsy yet still relevant to the music industry. Please find enclosed a copy of said DVD and a notepad and pen, so you can take notes and learn as you watch. Currently, the only reason to go to your gigs is to see Thom Yorke do the wiggly dance. Also, please be advised that it is either Thomas or Tom, not Thom. It just makes you look like a twat spelling it that way. Also, whenever you feel the need to release any more new material, please just go ahead and re-release OK Computer in different album packaging - it's easier on the public this way. Hell, it might also get people interested in you - who would just be let down when they heard that Kid A mostrosoty. In fact, you should just call in a compulsory recall of Kid A and Hail To The Chief on the grounds that they are not very good records at all. Trust me, nobody who owns it would mind. Once you have recalled them you must burn them, stomp on the remains, spit on them, load them into a spacecraft and send it into the heart of the nearest star that is not our sun. I wouldn't send it into the sun as if the sun got hold of that rubbish it just might want to commit suicide and go nova, destroying humanity as punishment for letting you get that much out of hand. This would prevent any children from being harmed by listening to that shite that you have churned out this past 7 years. You are already going to hell for writing that piece-of-shite Creep, at least try to make up for it by trying harder to be like Muse. Your only fans are people who don't know any better, music snobs who only like you because it makes them feel better than the rest of the world because "nobody else gets them" (not that anyone in their right mind wants to) and Generation Xers that are still stuck in the early-to-mid nineties. But even then they only ever listen to the first four tracks of OK Computer. Yours sincerely, Tim.
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Published On: 09-01-2006 05:31 AM
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Wow. What a slow day. Four hours at work with nothing to do but watch the rain fall and cars drive past. To sum it up in one word: boring. To sum it up in more than one word: stupefyingly, mind-witheringly, butt-fuckingly, brain-hearmmoragingly dull. But boring is just easier to say and type.

 

My question is now - "Why do we get bored?" Of all of the huge gamut of emotions that humans can feel, why in the blue hell is boredom included? And when did boredom evolve? We have to assume that it's been around for at least two or three thousand years, as history is littered with references to sporting, entertainment and lesuire events. The Romans had their colosseum events, the Egyptians had their architecture and the Greeks had the Olympics and fucked young boys.

 

But what of before that? Did the nomadic tribesmen of Inner Mongolia get together to kick a ball around? Did cro magnon man pit man against man in a battle of wits or weapons? What about the neanderthals? Every now and again did their chieftan order his two favourite women to wrestle each other in the mud for a prehistoric lesbian lick-off?

 

Either way, boredom only serves one purpose - to inspire us to do the shit that we wouldn't bother doing any other time.

 

Like writing this article.
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Published On: 07-30-2006 07:06 AM
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A Tale Of Fiery Italians, Thieves & Security Workers.....


(or He Died With A Felafel In His Butt)



About a decade ago, a superbly brilliant man wrote a book. This was not just some crappy fantasy or romance novel. It was a true recount of his adult life so far, told in a brilliant manner that made the reader laugh til he or she cried many a time throughout it's pages. That man was John Birmingham. The book was the widely popular 'He Died With A Felafel In His Hands'.
This is my addition.


I live in a sharehouse. God knows why, I think it would be a hell of a lot easier if Wendy and I moved out together.... but that's a story for another time. But, unfortunately I still am stuck in one.


I've been in this one house for coming on three years now. I've lived in almost ever bedroom in it and I've cleaned every single inch of it more times than I'd like to recount. Especially with the way some of my current and former housemates have lived. In this house I have been ripped off more times than imaginable and have had to deal with some very interesting people.


One girl I had in this house was an Italian wannabe-actress. This girl was so misguided to the industry and her own place within it that she honestly felt that she had the right to order people around as if she was a star. In reality she was a rather sub-average talent stuck in a drama course in a small town. Hearing her rants about how no-one else was as talented as her was juxtaposed against a 40-year old alcholic nursing student. When he was being interviewed for the room; his parents (yes, his parents came to the interview and did all his talking for him) told me that he didn't drink alcohol at all. As soon as they left, he spent the next five days in a drunken stupor.


I've had multiple housemates who have told me that they've paid bills, only to leave and have me find out that I'm in thousands of dollars of debt. I've had housemates do overnight runners whilst owing me hundreds of dollars of unpaid rent. Hell, I've even had housemates steal my appliances when doing runners. Housemates that never clean up, leaving mouldy plates all over the house. Housemates that leave cutlery underneath the house. One housemate even hated me so much for kicking him out that he took rotten meat and hid it in the fridge underneath some things that I never used just before I left for a holiday. When I got back, I opened up the fridge to have about two kilograms of maggots fall out onto the floor.


So why the hell do we put ourselves through this? Conveniance? I can't exactly see how not being able to use your lounge room when you want to is conveniant. Cheaper bills? Hah! I've found myself put out and owing more money than ever due to having housemates. It really must be because we have this need to surround ourselves with other people because we are all - deep down - incredibly lonely and scared of being by ourselves. Or we feel the need to pusish ourselves.


Anyway, I need to go chase a housemate up about rent........

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Published On: 07-26-2006 05:21 PM
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Hello all...

 

Well, hello the maybe one person who actually ends up reading this, but anyway that spoils the faux-grandeur that we automatically get when writing in a blog. You know, with that pretending people are reading or care enough about our day-to-day lives to spend five minutes out of their oh-so-busy day to find out what is going on in our sordid little lives. Although, I have to admit that there is that little part of us all who actually enjoys reading all about someone else's sordid little life. Like being a voyeur without seeing the boobies or a stalker without the restraining order.

 

Hold up, where was I? Oh yeah, getting suckered in by my own self-delusions again. Awesome. That's working out pretty grand for me.

 

Anyways, I'm me and this is my blog. So HAH! In your face naysayers (which actually it seems that I'm the only naysayer here so IN MY FACE, ME!)...... Although as I finally near the end of the introductory part of this entry I realise that I don't really have too much else to actually say. I don't exactly have any great big bits of news like a certain friend of mine yet.

 

Well, for the non-existant people who actually read this and care, that picture of Wendy (my life-partner) and I was taken at the Australian Idol auditions that were held in Brisbane. I made it all the way through to the TV judges! Before having my dream quashed. But oh well, I'll show them! After I've finished this rum. Maybe.

 

And as for which rum - it's Cougar Rum. My pick of the rums that are readily available on the Australian market. I do work in a bottleshop, remember.

 

Watch out for me on tv! Australian Idol starts soon and there is a good chance that I'll be shown on tv screwing up! So that gives all my friends who would under no other circumstance watch something like Australian Idol a good reason to have to suffer through at least one episode. That will probably cause them great pain. Good.

 

Anyway, I will attempt to update this thing fairly frequently. Really, I will. But then again I said the same thing about my livejournal & mp3.com.au accounts as well. Yeah, like that ever happened. But for now it is nearly three in the morning and I feel the need to play Heroes Of Might & Magic 2.

 

Goodbye, sweet imaginary people.

 

Timmy Normous.
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Comments
05-23-2010 10:57 PMReport
janelove's Avatar

Hello My Good Friend
how are you today i hope that every things is ok with you as is my pleasure to contact you after viewing your profile today and it interest me in having communication with you if you will have the desire with me so that we can get to know each other better and see what happened in future.i will be very happy if you can write me through my email for easiest communication and to know all about each other,here is my email [Janemickel@yahoo.com ] Jane to hear from you as i wish you all the best for your day.please do all you can to contact me through my email address [ Janemickel@yahoo.com ]and i believe that we can bring out
peace and love and also good understanding in our togetherness. in my nest mail to you i will tell you all about my self with my picture thanks.
yours new friend. Jane
05-12-2007 03:25 PMReport
zpics' Avatar

Please visit Zpics and see the great collection of photos we've found here on Zoints. If you have a great picture in your photo album that we've missed, let us know, maybe we'll add it.
12-17-2006 09:52 PMReport
12-11-2006 11:55 PMReport
Kittycat's Avatar

Quoting PrettyNormous:
Hello, my gorgeous, amazing, talented lady! I love you so much and I miss you when you are at work......Just thought you should know that........
 
Aww your so sweet.  I love you too and I'll see you at home Winking
10-12-2006 07:06 AMReport
Kittycat's Avatar

And, in addition to Scouzer's, here too.
08-23-2006 10:03 AMReport
TorchCrawl's Avatar

Timmy! Give me a call buddy. I have to arrange when I can start moving mate.
08-19-2006 12:38 AMReport
Kittycat's Avatar

Look at that gorgeous guy in the pic above.  I have the best boyfriend Smiling .... I'm sorry, I'm bored :P
08-16-2006 11:21 PMReport
TorchCrawl's Avatar

Jenny if the video of you I've watched a couple of times is any indication you are more than guitarded......you are ultra-mega-super-guitarded. That video is just amazing!
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Timmy Hollis
Age
29
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In a relationship
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Rockhampton
School
Central Queensland University
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Graduated
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